Five Ways To Have A Crappy Coffee Date With Me

hey there it’s David H Lawrence the 17th
and in today’s video I want to talk to
you
those of you who really enjoy the away
from language meaning you want to know
what problems to avoid when doing
something you know I said in an earlier
video there are two types of people
there are toward people and away from
people people that respond really well
to language that brings them towards
something that says okay here are the
best things to do the top five things to
do and then there are people who respond
to the away from language which is here
are the mistakes not to make here are
the things that will kill you and in
that video that I talked about it was
five ways of having an excellent coffee
date with me and I got some great
comments from people with some great
suggestions and I urge you to put some
comments and questions below this video
once you’ve watched it but in this one I
want to take the opposite AK and give
you five ways to have a crappy coffee
date with me these are the five things
that you probably want to avoid doing I
love coffee dates I love taking actors
who are new in town actors voice-over
talent performers in general who maybe
are stuck at a particular level if they
want to know about my experience and
they want to know what I think has
worked for me I’d love to share it with
them so what I do is I offer to take
them to lunch take the coffee I insist
on paying we talk about where they are
in their journey and we hopefully make
some breakthroughs who knows but there
are some things that I’ve seen people do
in these coffee dates that really kill
the buzz you know that really like make
it hard for them to take advantage of
what I have to offer and I’m not saying
you have to you know do everything that
I say you know take everything that I
say and anybody else says with a grain
of salt but don’t shoot yourself in the
foot by doing any of these five things
the first thing is you don’t take notes
that’s a great way to have a crappy
coffee day with me bring a notebook
bring something to write things down in
you know just something where if
something sparks you know you’re not
going to remember it especially when we
go to the kind of restaurants that we go
to where the food is fantastic you’re
going to remember that so make sure you
bring something to jot down
the answers to the questions that you
have another thing that kind of gets in
the way of things is when you remind me
that you have a fine arts degree like an
MFA or a BFA or you’re a doctorate or
whatever I I get that that’s a lot of
work and that that is a lot of of
studying and some great information but
I can tell you that nobody gives a rat
nobody sits there in a casting session
and says could you please tell me where
you got your degree from because that’s
gonna make a big difference it just does
it and it’s great that you have that
training but sometimes that can set you
up to say look I know what I’m doing
okay
I paid a lot of money to get that
advanced degree so right don’t let that
get in the way don’t let that be the
thing that you use to defend what you’re
currently doing or what you don’t know
what to do yet okay so that’s number two
number three you denigrate the business
that you’ve chosen to be in like by
saying oh you know what I only I only do
Shakespeare yeah I only do it only do
stage work aye-aye-aye will deign to do
cable television high end cable
television HBO Showtime but yeah I don’t
want to do sitcoms kershel is what don’t
do that I mean we’re here to tell
stories everybody thinks that there are
some lofty things to do and some not so
lofty things to do and the truth is why
not just be somebody who tells great
stories whether you’re telling the story
in an IVR session of how somebody’s
overdrawn at the bank or an audiobook or
a commercial or an industrial film you
know be a great storyteller don’t
denigrate the business that we’re in
you’re gonna make money you’re gonna get
health you’re gonna learn things no
matter what you’re doing I guarantee you
if you play carrot number two in a
supermarket commercial you’re going to
learn things about the business you’re
going to learn things about acting I
know really from carrot number two yes
I’m telling you you’re gonna learn so
that’s three number four you insist on
defending what you’re currently doing
your current theories
practice you know if they’re working
great for you that’s fantastic and I’m
assuming that having a lunch with me or
a coffee with me won’t be all that
helpful but if it’s just what you’re
comfortable with if you’re just doing it
because you would rather be comfy then
move outside your comfort zone and maybe
advance to another level in your career
you know it’s a safe way to play it but
it isn’t going to be helpful it isn’t
going to be useful for you so try not to
defend what you’re currently doing
because my answer to you there is or my
question to you there is gonna be very
dr. Phil ish and that is so how’s that
working out for you you know why are you
asking me for help I want to help you I
absolutely do but set aside that and
just be open to what I have to say and
then finally number five you never
follow up it’s like I’ve met literally
hundreds of people and many of them have
stayed in touch followed up let me know
when they have successes when they have
challenges others have kind of like done
a drive-by and I’ve never heard from
them again now it’s possible that they
decided this wasn’t for them this wasn’t
a business for them it wasn’t a practice
for them but it’s also possible that
they don’t want to bother me they don’t
want to you know you’re you burp effect
you’re doing what you’re doing you’re
doing you’re pretty successful I don’t
want to like bother you bother me let me
know what’s going on with you let me
know what your successes have been like
what’s the accomplishments that you’ve
had get in touch stay in touch
I’d love that because that lets me know
that I’m on the right path I mean I base
what I tell people in my coffee dates on
what works for me and that’s all I say
is look this works this works for me
I’ve seen it work for other people I
think it’s the best practice see what
you think be open to it
right so now I want to know from you
what kind of really crappy coffee dates
you’ve had what kind of opportunities
for mentorship you had and it didn’t
turn out so well and was it you or was
it them or was it both of you what
challenges have you
faced you know what what would you never
do again
what would you love to see happen that
you hardly ever see happening put that
in the comments below if you have a
question about how to handle mentorship
and and how to be open to those kinds of
things that’s what coffee dates are all
about is mentoring people and so let me
know in the in the comments below let me
know what’s going on and of course you
can always subscribe to my channel just
click on my ugly mug over there my very
creepy evil evil villain ish mug or you
can see the latest video that I put out
on my youtube channel I’d love for you
to subscribe to the channel and you’ll
get them on a regular basis and in the
meantime I’m David H Lawrence the
seventeenth I thank you so much for
watching and I will see you tomorrow